"I look like shit, I feel like shit and I probably smell like shit too, given that the field was covered in it."

Hurting yourself at football can be humbling.
Especially when while you are lying on the ground with your eyes shut, trying to not cry or pass out, you can hear the boys whisper about whether they should warn you to not roll to your right while writhing. There is dog poop on the right.
And then halfway home, when you tell your friend to leave you there to die because you are too tired to limp any more, your friend decides that you are light enough to be carried home the rest of the way and scoops you up and marches down the street. And you, while being carried down the street like a baby, being a stubborn ass of sorts, explain to passers-by that it's only because you hurt your knee.

I hope this will be funny once the pain recedes.