The Peacock in the bathroom and other scary stories of hostel life. (Hehe.)

Maths class. Real Analysis. I had as usual zoned away to a happier dimension inside my head as is my wont on the rare occasion that I cannot make my getaway before the prof walks in after quantum class.

The class drones on and on. Even the nerds get bored. "Please let us go" they whine, plead.
"I am an old woman, if i can teach you can sit and learn. So just keep sitting."
Hmm, prof isn't pliable today...end of the year syllabus ending blues.
"How old do you think I am?" Sudden strange question from prof. "I am 63. My birthday is in ... I'm a Pisces"
"Do I look like a Pisces?"
I blinked and stirred. Wow, the math prof likes astrology. Who knew! I sure as hell do NOT know what a Piscean looks like.
Someone answers her with a vague negative. "See there are billions of people in the world." OHKAY, this is getting strange.
"Only twelve sunsigns."
JEEEZ
"So the probability of someone having any of these sunsigns is very large"
Probability theory meets astrology. Kill me.
"But you can't divide all these billions of people into only twelve types right?"
No? Why? Stupid vs Smart. Them vs Me. Astrology believers vs Astrology disbelievers.
"So, when you are born is not what matters"
Finally this is veering back to the realm of the scientific and logical.
"What really matters is..." Genes??
"What really matters is the planets you were born under"
KILL ME. (I'm a gemini.)

Water water everywhere.......

It was a typical summer afternoon- nobody studying even though we all regularly expressed intentions of getting up and getting to it. Nobody eating coz it was too hot. Nobody even moving much. The water coolers were giving us the steady trickle of water they always do. The long impatient swearword and punch punctuated wait to fill a litre of water.
And then today the trickle turned to a drop. And then the drop... it just went and vanished. And this is in the heat in the middle of our exams.
So then we call the warden. She isnt around today. We call the principal. She doesn't pick up. We call our darling Prof Nandini Datta who immediately jumps into action and starts finding out what is being done about the problem. While we wonder who's turn it is to go to the ATM to withdraw money... to buy water. Eventually the crazyness sets in.

"You know that part of the wall which is opposite the principal's house?"
" yes..."
" We should go stand there and throw all our empty water bottles at her."
" And shout slogans?"
" Haha.. we're gonna be too parched to do that."

We call a man to order water. He refuses to deliver for only one order. Not enough profit involved. What will he gain out of it, he asks us. Not one to back down Don answers immediately. "Our blessings, bhaiyya."

Me and Gandhari are the only two whose exams are going on. We probably felt the pressure more... and burst into song.
"all you need is love.
ALL you need is love
all you NEED is LOOve
EVERYBODY
ALL YOU NEED IS LOVE!"
Don throws us out of her room. She thinks she also needs water. Love isn't quite that essential.

Dev tags 200 photos on facebook. I tell my mom that she may as well send me money to buy mineral water but that stuff tastes like crap and i'd rather have tap water. Then declare that i will blow every last paisa on beer. Dev pours half a bottle of talcum powder down my back and turns me into a ghost reeking of flowers.


Eventually a tanker of funny tasting water does arrive. Not that that made us study all that much but it did make us stop singing for the while

There are times, when one studies. Yes, that's what I said one does. As you can see in above picture- one also eats a lot.
You spread all our books out in an attempt to find something atleast vaguely familiar. ALL your books.
And you end up doodling. Invariably.