When you start dreaming about buying shorts, even though you are a person who hates shopping, you know you have been away from the tropical home country for too long.
It is snowing here.
As mom would say, "It's a good thing. Your tan will fade." And then I would     grumble,"Nothing wrong with a tan mom, we're Indians." And in my head I would think that we're the color of caramel and more often that not, this would take me on a tangential line of thought. Caramel pudding. Chocolate Mousse. Blueberry Cheeeeeesecaaaake.
My mom does complain that I space out in the middle of too many conversations. 

Email from home

_ passed away. Call her.

Still haven't figured this one out. 

"Last night I dreamt I went to Manderley again."
That's how Rebecca starts.
A line I had probably never appreciated fully till today.



Last night I went to my flat in S*******e again. I was crossing the parking lot when something invisible grabbed my collar and pulled me backwards. For a second I was so scared, but then I sensed that it was you. So I laughed.
And you appeared.
And for a while everything was right with the world.

You even made me clean some things, making excuses that your ghost form did not allow you to do it. Prankster.

Typical you. Enjoying your ghostlyness with more joy and enthusiasm than most of us manage for our lives. We caught up. Like we always did(do?) after a year of our unintersecting lives have gone by. Your brows knit together, listening like everything I say or do is important. An expression I did not know I remembered so well.

It was an afternoon(night?) well spent dude. Thanks for dropping by.



It was almost a pity that I had to wake up.

The first two days of university were almost like a 'what-not-to-do-in-the-first-two-days-of-uni' manual.
I missed orientation. Because I am disoriented in space and time.
I missed the welcome party. Because I am lazy.
I did not knock on the other doors in my flat and say hi. Because I am socially awkward.
I ate only sandwiches. Refer to welcome party point.
I spent most of my conversations wondering who I was talking to instead of participating intelligently. Because my brain cannot handle being introduced to more than one dozen people per day.

Things are looking up though.
Every appointment that I mis-schedule and miss, I cancel formally.
I have made it to one party. Even though I was late because I fell asleep before it.
I eat cooked food. Mostly cooked by my roommates. But also sometimes by me. And I have found out who I live with.
I attend classes. Not necessarily my classes. I still don't know which ones those are. But I attend some classes.
And I live near here so life can't possible be too bad

I'm reading in the bus today. Wondering if the sweaty smell is the guy next to me or..... I was on the way home to take a bath. A whole day of overseeing repairs could make you sweaty. Fan repairs. Haha.
My phone beeps. I perform a complicated manouvre involving head, bag, book and phone in pocket in limited space. The text is simple.
Yes or no?
I blink. Then feeling very positive inspite of everything i text back a 'yes'. And for good measure add a 'What was the question?'. Thankfully my old roommate is used to my conversational nonsense and explains the question to me.
'Did you get the parcel?'
Oh. The one I have been begging for for only the last ten weeks.
Sheepish reply-"I haven't been home in 24 hours. Don't know if I have received any mail."

Reminds me of another time. I receive a text from my brother. 'Pick a number between one to twelve.'
So I get excited. Do vague probability sums in my head and text a number to him. Then I wait for a long ten minutes and send another 'Now what?'.
The curt reply. "It wasn't a magic trick. I was choosing a sample question paper to solve."
Such cruel disappointment.

blue is the color. and the mood?

First ChelseaFC match of the season. Sunday. 6pm in India. At around 5.30 my aunt feels the need to go to the mall one last time before she returns to her small town.
We run to the mall, pick up a t-shirt and run back. Some sort of record timing, even with a break to grab some street food. I can still make second half.
The moment I sit on the sofa my mom comes in with a demand that I go buy dinner.
"I want forty-five minutes. Leave me alone."
For whatever reason my mom and my aunt plonk down beside me.
Sometimes their chatter breaks through my invisible barrier of sound.
"This guy is wearing a monkey cap!"
"Oh, yeah! Why?"
"Just like a Bengali"
"Why? Is he cold?"
"It's not a monkey cap. He had a concussion once."
"Ohh. If he had a heart attack why does he wear a monkey cap?"
"He had a concussion."
"These English medics are so great. That black guy who had a heart attack on the field, he was clinically dead for a few minutes."
For a minute I'm wondering how she confused Cech with a black man. Then the commentary is back on.
"He should wear a helmet. Why aren't his ears covered? Did you know he could die if his ears are hit hard enough?"
"I think he'd die of the heat if he covered his ears. He is playing football."
.
.
.
.
"Where is the Chelsea goalkeeper? How come we haven't seen him yet?"

Mars

The curiosity rover landed on Mars on the 5th. Therefore the new header. MARSscape. Whoo!